Those of you who mis-read the title and thought you were entering the "Need to Beat the Meat?" zone - please feel free to leave now - that's going to be tomorrow's entertainment.
Today, however, I have a treat for all of you out there who are sick & tired of sweating your collective asses off in this sauna of a summer and have dreams of a tall, cold one - on a stick! - to assuage those rivulets of perspiration, coursing down your glistening torsos...damn, where was I? Oh yeah - The Hopsicle!
(Note: The remainder of this post was pithily composed by the folks over at http://www.urbandaddy.com/ - reprinted without anyone's permission)
Take a can of beer.
Lift tab, tilt back, consume, repeat.
A well-worn formula, easily mastered. Yet in these dangerous times, we feel it may be necessary to unmaster it.
Warning: this involves a samurai sword.
Introducing The Hopsicle Experience, a frozen can of beer, sliced in half and served like a Push Pop for big kids, launching today at Diablo Royale Este.
Now, the thing about the hopsicle is that it looks like your standard can of Tecate: Red. Cylindrical. Icy cold. Except the barman-witchdoctors at Diablo have taken the “icy” bit quite literally, injecting the beer with simple syrup and lime juice, jamming a wooden stick into the hole of the can and then putting it in the freezer. For four days.
The result is a genuine beer popsicle, which the bartender must saw in half with a serrated steak knife (or samurai sword) to open. Then it’s up to you to push the wooden stick upward to dispense the hopsicle in true Push Pop style, and decide if you want your savory sweet frozen joyride bathed in tequila as well (note: you want this).
And on certain days, when those same barman-witchdoctors are feeling especially inspired, they may take their creation one step further and turn over an entire margarita machine to the conjuring of potent beer slushies.
No samurai sword required.