That website (book, TV show, cult etc.) "Shit My Dad Says" is pretty hilarious. It never fails to crack me up.
I recently realized that I could run a similar website called "Shit My Boyfriend Says" - Why? Cuz he's just as amusing as the crotchety sage from "Shit My Dad Says" and it's selfish of me not to share these ridiculous nuggets (teehee) of wisdom with the rest of the world!
For example, the other day he declared, "Anytime you want to keep doing exactly what you're doing, but make it juuust a little more hilarious? Simply wiggle your bottom!"
He further elaborated, "Imagine yourself waiting in line at the bank - BORING! But then, imagine yourself in line at the bank, but wiggling your bottom - FUN!"