Clumsiness is Next to Bruiselyness

My clumsiness is becoming even more detrimental to my well-being than usual.

OK, I've always been clumsy.

I did slam my thumb in a car door when I was 17 (without any intervention from anyone--I can't say I was pushed, unfortunately--and with zero alcohol consumption on my part). To this day the nail (and I use the word loosely) does not grow properly. Truth be told, it's pretty friggin' gross.

I have a pretty big scar under my right eyebrow from where, in the late 90s, one night I whipped open the freezer door, instead of the fridge door (which is what I was going for) right into my eye and I was way too embarrassed to go to the hospital for the necessary stitches.

I have a giant bruise around my eye socket this week. In my defence, it was mostly the dog's fault..we were play-fighting/wrestling and she reared up her head and smashed her skull into my face. It hurt so much, I was sure that she, too, would be injured.

I was in a massive amount of pain, but my first concern was her well-being:

"Omigod! Kuda, are you OK??!"

*pant* *pant* *wagwagwag* *run to retrieve ball*

She was fine.

This morning, I punched the bathroom doorjamb as I was walking into the bathroom...granted, I was in a hurry, but I've lived there for over five years and I'm pretty sure the width of the door hasn't changed in that time. Now I've got a cut and an impending bruise on my hand. Yay!

I noticed this morning, as I was drying my hair, that I have a giant round bruise on my wrist. No idea where that originated.

*sigh*

If I die in some horrible accident, odds are, it will be entirely my fault...possibly as a result of a dog-induced concussion...