Diet Coke vs. Diet Pepsi

Yes, I am so desperate for a blogging topic that I am resorting to "cola wars" to fill the space...

I was a Diet Coke fiend for many years, as are/were most of my girlfriends.

In fact, my friend Gill is so adamant about the supremacy and superiority of DC (as we lovingly called it), that she angrily reconsiders our friendship whenever I mention that I now prefer Diet Pepsi.

But why do I listen to Gill? She smells bad. And lives in hell..er..L.A...What does she know?

Anyway...I loved Diet Coke and believed I always would.

When I started working for a (now-defunct) movie theatre chain back in '01, I was disheartened to learn that they were a Pepsi company. All of their pop machines were stocked with Pepsi products. Whatever was an aspartame addict with a penchant for Diet Coke to do??!

I could have ventured out to procure Diet Coke, or I could have brought it from home, but I was enticed by the relative proximity of the Pepsi machine and the allure of paying a mere 50 cents per pop--a great deal! As a result, I grudgingly started drinking Diet Pepsi...I wasn't happy about it, but I will admit to enjoying all that extra change jingling around in the bottom of my back-pack.

One day, a few months into my tenure at this company, we ordered lunch from a pizza place that served Coke products. Huzzah! Diet Coke for Julesy! Woot-woot!

I was breathless with anticipation.

When lunchtime and pizza arrived, I hungrily threw aside the pizza boxes and tore open the plastic bag--cruelly tied with an impenetrable knot--that entrapped the beverages.

The satisfying "fzzzt" when I cracked open the Diet Coke was almost orgasmic.

*glug*glug*glug*

Something was horribly wrong. The Diet Coke tasted AWFUL!

"Something is wrong with this Diet Coke! It tastes like ass!" I cried in terror.

One of my co-workers took the can of pop from my hand, took a whiff and then took a tentative sip.

"There's nothing wrong with this pop. It tastes just like Diet Coke," she pronounced quizzically.

I frantically grabbed another one from the bag, opened it and took a drink. It, too, made me retch.

The realization that I had slowly become addicted to another brand of pop washed over me like a carbonated, low-calorie, tidal wave.

Years later, Diet Pepsi remains my preference.

Perhaps they use addictive ingredients culled from the rainforest that, if used for good (rather than cola-related evil), could cure a multitude of diseases.

But, for now, I'll just sit back and enjoy an ice, cold Diet Pepsi and try not to think about it.