I made a joke today on a friend's Facebook page about her being a "vampire crossed with an Amway salesperson" - based on her unrelenting status updates encouraging folks to donate blood, not in a harrassing kind of way, but definitely friendly/aggressive...but, also, with an undertone of "make the sale, no matter what".
The part about her being a "vampire" was obviously a reference to her NEED FOR BLOOD..the "Amway salesperson" part was a reference to everyone's image of a person who comes to their door selling Amway - conciliatory, fawning & deadly.
I had this fuzzy image of the Amway salesperson, ingrained in my mind, from the time I was young - I'm not sure why...movies, rumours, books - I have no idea. It became much more clear on February 14th, 1995.
I was in university, finishing up my last year at Queen's. My boyfriend (we'll call him Rocky) and I had plans that night for Valentine's Day (probably the last time I pretended to/or actually did give a shit about that particular Hallmark holiday).
We had dinner reservations for 7 pm. I got a call that afternoon from Rocky - he said he had received a call from an old friend, who was passing through town and "had something important to talk to him about" and that he and his fiancee wanted to stop by and wondered if he had plans.
Rocky told him that it was Valentine's Day and that we were going out for dinner. They said they only wanted to stop in for a few minutes, it wouldn't take too long, but he really needed to talk to Rocky. My boyfriend surmised that this guy was going to ask him to be in his wedding. OK. I was cool with that.
I arrived at Rocky's house during a crazy snowstorm, well ahead of our dinner reservation.
His friends arrived about an hour later than they said they'd arrive - but we still had some time to make our reservation.
We all met, exchanged pleasantries, chatted for about 20 minutes. The chit-chat waned and the fiancee said, "Honey, do you want to get the stuff from the car?"
My "this is weird" radar started beeping.
Rocky's friend went out to the car (in the still burgeoning snowstorm) and came back with a flipchart and markers and a box full of crap.
I suspected this was not a "Can you be my best man?" kind of visit.
He set up his shit and started his spiel. I remember it, almost to the letter.
"Do you ever drive down the 401?"
Me & Rocky: Yes
"Who is working at the fast food restaurants there?"
Me & Rocky: Um...students?
"NO!! OLD PEOPLE! OLD PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO MONEY!"
At this point, I was freaked. I knew this dude was a scammer and he was using his previous relationship with my boyfriend to sell us something.
And I was pissed off.
At this point, our dinner was fucked. And that they were using their friendship to scam someone (us!), use someone (us!) and ruin their night (ours!)!
They carried on with their presentation...they tried to convince us that the only way to have any successful way through life was by joining their team...though it took them forever to actually mention "Amway".
Once they finally named the brand, I excused myself politely, and retired to Rocky's room. His roommate Terry visited me at one point (with a rum & Coke for me, thank you very much, Terry...wherever you are, thank you!) and we were both blown away by their ridiculous display. We commisserated.
Shockingly, afterwards, Rocky was completely pissed off at me for "being rude".
Yep. I was rude. Oops.
And that was my experience with Amway. :)
Thursday, May 06, 2010
Poop's Birthday Weekend
This past weekend was Poop's birthday (Yay!) and since we hadn't planned any sort of celebratory extravaganza (due to all sorts of crappy stuff that's been going on lately), we made a last-minute decision to take off to Niagara Falls for the weekend.
We both took Friday afternoon off and hit the road for Niagara around 3 pm. Unfortunately, being Friday, rush hour out of the city started at about 2 pm. We were stuck in some pretty nasty traffic all the way to Hamilton (and beyond?). It was, as you can imagine, frustrating. Moral of the story for us: Always take the 407.
We had booked a room at the "Country Inn & Suites", located directly across the street from Casino Niagara. We've never stayed there before (I believe it's relatively new) but we'd definitely go back - we got a great deal (total bill for 2 nights, including tax & parking etc. was less than $180). The room was more than adequate, very comfortable beds/pillows, nice decor (though those olde tyme TVs that aren't flat actually sorta freak me out now: WHAT IS THAT THING?!! IT'S SO BIG!).
We learned, upon checking in, that there was a big "dance competition" occurring in Niagara Falls that weekend - which explained the 8-year-old girl in the lobby with the slicked-back hair and sporting eye makeup akin to Cleopatra.
We actually saw a number of hyper little girls wearing makeup (and unhappy brothers & dads caddying tap shoes & sparkly costumes) over the course of the weekend. I think several of them were in our hotel. The accomodating desk clerk put us on the 7th (top) floor, assuring us it was the "quietest" floor - and it was, til Sunday morning, when I came dangerously close to unleashing a string of expletives on the noisy assholes in the hall who woke me up...
Anyway, we arrived at the hotel around 5:30 on Friday and after checking in to the hotel, headed over to the casino for dinner & subsequent shenanigans. We tried to get a comp (some quantity of $$ from the casino) to eat at Lucky's (the "steakhouse" at Casino Niagara - Note: despite being designated a "steakhouse", they have wonderful vegetarian, seafood & pasta dishes, too), but we were informed we needed to gamble for a bit before we could get any freebies. We played for a little bit, then opted for the buffet - which was disgusting, but quelled the hunger pangs temporarily.
Friday night at Casino Niagara is ""Ladies Night" - which means they hold draws for prizes (for the women) and try to give all the ladies roses when they arrive. I had to turn down no fewer than 4 pink roses - who wants to carry a friggin' flower around all night? (Carrying a flower around all night would seriously impede my ability to gamble my money away as quickly as possible - you'd think that casino management would realize this floral gift program is to their money-grubbing detriment!)
I love Niagara Falls in general and the casino specifically. The cross-section of people is unfailingly amusing. For example, you very rarely see such a high concentration of mullets in one place nowadays. I also love the fact that I get ID'd everytime I go there - and they're always surprised when they find out my actual age.
Poop played poker for a few hours, I played some slots & some Caribbean Stud - neither of us had much good luck that night, so around 12:30 we decided to leave and get something to eat - after our wholly unsatisfying buffet experience, we were hungry again. We decided on Kelsey's - because it was nearby and because it had a huge patio (and it was an absolutely beautiful night). And while I normally try to avoid this type of conveyor-belt/chain restaurant, it was actually quite good. I had a Cosmopolitan and some sort of cheese/spinach dip thing served with crispy pita pieces - tasty & filling. Poop had a Jack & Coke and a brilliant innovation called "Buffalo Perogies" - basically, perogies tossed in buffalo wing sauce - genius! All in all, an enjoyable end to a fun evening.
We headed back to the hotel and crashed pretty quickly...and slept soundly til we were awakened by the alarm on the Iphone in the morning...Poop had set it to go off in time so that he could partake of the "Free Breakfast" that was included with the cost of our room, the availability of which ended at 10:30 (he really loves a good deal and hates to miss out). Poop went downstairs and got us some egg sandwiches and yogurts - not bad! Though he was somewhat dejected since one of the brochures promised a waffle station - he was really looking forward to making (and eating!) his own waffles. Poor Poop. Didn't they know it was his birfday weekend?!?!!
We lazed around for a bit, debating what we should do with our Saturday. We decided to go to Dave & Buster's and spend exhorbitant amounts of money so we could play games. Wheeee!
The forecast was calling for a storm and the sky over the falls was threatening to open up and pour at any second - every time I looked out the window it appeared that the velocity of the wind had increased - litter was flying everywhere and little girls in spandex & hooker makeup looked like they were going to blow away! We decided to wait for a bit before heading out, to see what was going on with the weather, since neither of us brought an umbrella nor did either of us feel like participating in a tornado. As it turned out, we didn't have to wait very long - the storm was over as quickly as it started (though it sure poured down hard for a few minutes) and we were off on our next adventure.
Before leaving the hotel, we raided the brochure area of the lobby and ripped out some Dave & Buster's coupons from one of the tourist guidebooks. We love our great deals!
Stepping outside was a bit of shock - the humidity was atrocious, particularly for early May - hot & sticky. I definitely didn't need the fleece jacket I'd brought with me!
We walked over to Dave & Busters and had a great time, playing skeeball, air hockey, a random shooting-at-monsters game (that made my hands really sore) and a basketball free-throw game where you get as many baskets as possible in a certain amount of time.
I was at a disadvantage in all of our competitions, never having played any of these games before, whereas Poop grew up playing them! He was incredulous that I didn't have any experience with skeeball or air hockey - I guess you just can't comprehend the "growing up in Dryden" experience unless you've been there...we 5-pin bowled in Dryden, we snowmachined in Dryden, we fished in Dryden - we did not play skeeball in Dryden!!
All that activity made us very thirsty (a sad commentary on our physical fitness), so we ventured out to the Clifton Hill area to grab a tasty beverage and a snack. The area is pretty much always overrun with tourists, from all over the world, but none of them annoyed me (much). I do try to be a good Canadian ambassador as much possible, you know!.
We grabbed some soft drinks (mmmm..fountain soda..) and a hard, salty pretzel (with mustard, of course!) and found a seat. We were impressed with how well they maintain the area - probably 20 or more park benches/picnic tables where we were situated and every single bench had a garbage can beside it - I know people will still litter (lazy assholes) but this certainly must reduce the urge!
We returned to D & B to use up the rest of our credits. I just assumed we'd give all pf our prize tickets to some kid when we were finished - I know I wasn't interested in anything from the "prize" area? Apparently, Poop had other ideas and the birfday boy gets what he wants! He used our meagre allocation of tickets to purchase a maple, moose-shaped sucker. He saved it for the drive home on Sunday where he proceeded to eat an entire antler & half the moose's head before asking me to take it away and never let him near it again (see pic).
After our D & B adventure, we decided to get some ice cream cones - seemed like a hot day/birthday kind of thing to do - I got a Rocky Road cone (Gross - I had no idea there were marshmellows in Rocky Road. I'm not sure what I thought it was going to be, but that wasn't it!) and Poop had something else, that escapes me at the moment, cuz I'm so upset thinking about a delicious ice cream cone opportunity spoiled by marshmellows!! ARGH!!
We went back to the hotel to relax for a while (i.e. so Poop could have a 2-hour nap) and shower before dinner. Our plan for the evening was to go to Mamma Mia's, an Italian place that we used to frequent, but haven't been to in a few years, and then go back to the casino. I was also looking forward to having a nice, relaxing bubble bath - I haven't bathed in ages (well, I've washed myself, but I only have a shower at my house, so I almost never get to have a bath!) so it was going to be a treat!
To my surprise & delight, Dirty Dancing was on the TV! And, even though I've seen it about 175 times and I know all the dialogue by heart (and it's always somewhat bittersweet to watch, since both Jerry Orbach and Patrick Swayze are with Phil Hartman now), naturally, I had to watch it. It was as delightful as ever.
We had a nice dinner at Mamma Mia's - Poop's newfound love of Eggplant Parmesan is a revelation. He declared Mamma Mia's version to be "melt-in-the-mouth delicious". My dinner wasn't spectacular, but it was OK. Here's a picture of Poop holding up the "candle" on the table (it wasn't lit, so we looked at it more closely and realized it was plastic and had a switch that needed to be turned on - classy!).
The whole weekend was a lot of fun - thanks, Niagara Falls! Happy birthday, Poop!
We both took Friday afternoon off and hit the road for Niagara around 3 pm. Unfortunately, being Friday, rush hour out of the city started at about 2 pm. We were stuck in some pretty nasty traffic all the way to Hamilton (and beyond?). It was, as you can imagine, frustrating. Moral of the story for us: Always take the 407.
We had booked a room at the "Country Inn & Suites", located directly across the street from Casino Niagara. We've never stayed there before (I believe it's relatively new) but we'd definitely go back - we got a great deal (total bill for 2 nights, including tax & parking etc. was less than $180). The room was more than adequate, very comfortable beds/pillows, nice decor (though those olde tyme TVs that aren't flat actually sorta freak me out now: WHAT IS THAT THING?!! IT'S SO BIG!).
We learned, upon checking in, that there was a big "dance competition" occurring in Niagara Falls that weekend - which explained the 8-year-old girl in the lobby with the slicked-back hair and sporting eye makeup akin to Cleopatra.
We actually saw a number of hyper little girls wearing makeup (and unhappy brothers & dads caddying tap shoes & sparkly costumes) over the course of the weekend. I think several of them were in our hotel. The accomodating desk clerk put us on the 7th (top) floor, assuring us it was the "quietest" floor - and it was, til Sunday morning, when I came dangerously close to unleashing a string of expletives on the noisy assholes in the hall who woke me up...
Anyway, we arrived at the hotel around 5:30 on Friday and after checking in to the hotel, headed over to the casino for dinner & subsequent shenanigans. We tried to get a comp (some quantity of $$ from the casino) to eat at Lucky's (the "steakhouse" at Casino Niagara - Note: despite being designated a "steakhouse", they have wonderful vegetarian, seafood & pasta dishes, too), but we were informed we needed to gamble for a bit before we could get any freebies. We played for a little bit, then opted for the buffet - which was disgusting, but quelled the hunger pangs temporarily.
Friday night at Casino Niagara is ""Ladies Night" - which means they hold draws for prizes (for the women) and try to give all the ladies roses when they arrive. I had to turn down no fewer than 4 pink roses - who wants to carry a friggin' flower around all night? (Carrying a flower around all night would seriously impede my ability to gamble my money away as quickly as possible - you'd think that casino management would realize this floral gift program is to their money-grubbing detriment!)
I love Niagara Falls in general and the casino specifically. The cross-section of people is unfailingly amusing. For example, you very rarely see such a high concentration of mullets in one place nowadays. I also love the fact that I get ID'd everytime I go there - and they're always surprised when they find out my actual age.
Poop played poker for a few hours, I played some slots & some Caribbean Stud - neither of us had much good luck that night, so around 12:30 we decided to leave and get something to eat - after our wholly unsatisfying buffet experience, we were hungry again. We decided on Kelsey's - because it was nearby and because it had a huge patio (and it was an absolutely beautiful night). And while I normally try to avoid this type of conveyor-belt/chain restaurant, it was actually quite good. I had a Cosmopolitan and some sort of cheese/spinach dip thing served with crispy pita pieces - tasty & filling. Poop had a Jack & Coke and a brilliant innovation called "Buffalo Perogies" - basically, perogies tossed in buffalo wing sauce - genius! All in all, an enjoyable end to a fun evening.
We headed back to the hotel and crashed pretty quickly...and slept soundly til we were awakened by the alarm on the Iphone in the morning...Poop had set it to go off in time so that he could partake of the "Free Breakfast" that was included with the cost of our room, the availability of which ended at 10:30 (he really loves a good deal and hates to miss out). Poop went downstairs and got us some egg sandwiches and yogurts - not bad! Though he was somewhat dejected since one of the brochures promised a waffle station - he was really looking forward to making (and eating!) his own waffles. Poor Poop. Didn't they know it was his birfday weekend?!?!!
We lazed around for a bit, debating what we should do with our Saturday. We decided to go to Dave & Buster's and spend exhorbitant amounts of money so we could play games. Wheeee!
The forecast was calling for a storm and the sky over the falls was threatening to open up and pour at any second - every time I looked out the window it appeared that the velocity of the wind had increased - litter was flying everywhere and little girls in spandex & hooker makeup looked like they were going to blow away! We decided to wait for a bit before heading out, to see what was going on with the weather, since neither of us brought an umbrella nor did either of us feel like participating in a tornado. As it turned out, we didn't have to wait very long - the storm was over as quickly as it started (though it sure poured down hard for a few minutes) and we were off on our next adventure.
Before leaving the hotel, we raided the brochure area of the lobby and ripped out some Dave & Buster's coupons from one of the tourist guidebooks. We love our great deals!
Stepping outside was a bit of shock - the humidity was atrocious, particularly for early May - hot & sticky. I definitely didn't need the fleece jacket I'd brought with me!
We walked over to Dave & Busters and had a great time, playing skeeball, air hockey, a random shooting-at-monsters game (that made my hands really sore) and a basketball free-throw game where you get as many baskets as possible in a certain amount of time.
I was at a disadvantage in all of our competitions, never having played any of these games before, whereas Poop grew up playing them! He was incredulous that I didn't have any experience with skeeball or air hockey - I guess you just can't comprehend the "growing up in Dryden" experience unless you've been there...we 5-pin bowled in Dryden, we snowmachined in Dryden, we fished in Dryden - we did not play skeeball in Dryden!!
One odd occurrence while we where there: A woman carrying a baby who (along with her family) followed us from game to game, watching us as we laughed, hooted & hollered and, in my case, liberally used four-letter words. There was even a long, intense air hockey rally that they got a bit too into (emotionally) - when I eventually scored on myself (yes, I'm that kinda girl), they appeared devastated!
All that activity made us very thirsty (a sad commentary on our physical fitness), so we ventured out to the Clifton Hill area to grab a tasty beverage and a snack. The area is pretty much always overrun with tourists, from all over the world, but none of them annoyed me (much). I do try to be a good Canadian ambassador as much possible, you know!.
We grabbed some soft drinks (mmmm..fountain soda..) and a hard, salty pretzel (with mustard, of course!) and found a seat. We were impressed with how well they maintain the area - probably 20 or more park benches/picnic tables where we were situated and every single bench had a garbage can beside it - I know people will still litter (lazy assholes) but this certainly must reduce the urge!
We returned to D & B to use up the rest of our credits. I just assumed we'd give all pf our prize tickets to some kid when we were finished - I know I wasn't interested in anything from the "prize" area? Apparently, Poop had other ideas and the birfday boy gets what he wants! He used our meagre allocation of tickets to purchase a maple, moose-shaped sucker. He saved it for the drive home on Sunday where he proceeded to eat an entire antler & half the moose's head before asking me to take it away and never let him near it again (see pic).
After our D & B adventure, we decided to get some ice cream cones - seemed like a hot day/birthday kind of thing to do - I got a Rocky Road cone (Gross - I had no idea there were marshmellows in Rocky Road. I'm not sure what I thought it was going to be, but that wasn't it!) and Poop had something else, that escapes me at the moment, cuz I'm so upset thinking about a delicious ice cream cone opportunity spoiled by marshmellows!! ARGH!!
We went back to the hotel to relax for a while (i.e. so Poop could have a 2-hour nap) and shower before dinner. Our plan for the evening was to go to Mamma Mia's, an Italian place that we used to frequent, but haven't been to in a few years, and then go back to the casino. I was also looking forward to having a nice, relaxing bubble bath - I haven't bathed in ages (well, I've washed myself, but I only have a shower at my house, so I almost never get to have a bath!) so it was going to be a treat!
To my surprise & delight, Dirty Dancing was on the TV! And, even though I've seen it about 175 times and I know all the dialogue by heart (and it's always somewhat bittersweet to watch, since both Jerry Orbach and Patrick Swayze are with Phil Hartman now), naturally, I had to watch it. It was as delightful as ever.
The whole weekend was a lot of fun - thanks, Niagara Falls! Happy birthday, Poop!
Saturday, April 17, 2010
What I've Been Up To....
When not out enjoying the weather, or semi-enjoying sporting events*, the past 2 weeks have been dominated by Dexter. Dexter the TV show and Dexter Morgan, the character. We rented the season 1 DVDs over Easter weekend and now we're in the middle of the second season.
As you can probably surmise from that last stat, we looooove this fucking show.
And I now have a small crush on a soulless, fictional serial killer.
Just another day in the life of Patchoulia!
I've also been going to the gym quite a bit, after work. The gym I go to is at my office, which is obviously the epitome of convenience There are no excuses not to work out - except on those days when you forget your t-shirt at home, on top of the dryer - exercising in a metallic satiny blouse somehow just doesn't do it for me.
It's a pretty good facility, despite a distinct insufficiency of group fitness classes that appeal to me (Yogalates, anyone? WTF is a yogalate? Is that some kind of new-age coffee beverage?).
The gym has decent equipment in pretty good quantities - even during the "rush" periods, you can usually get on a machine or use the weights you need.
Best of all, it only costs $5 every 2 weeks and it's taken right off my paycheque!
Recently, the fitness centre staff have been sending out regular emails reminding members to lock up their stuff because they've been experiencing a lot of thefts lately. There are signs all over the locker room as well, reminding us to lock up our belongings or risk losing them.
The other night, I had to take a squirt** before working out, so I hauled all my crap (backpack, jacket, purse) into the bathroom stall with me before heading to the locker room. I did what I had to do, got changed, locked up my stuff (per posted warnings) and proceeded to get sweaty.
Later, after I'd finished working out, I opened my locker and realized that my purse wasn't there. Suddenly, it dawned on me that I'd left it hanging on the coat-hook in the bathroom stall. Then I started hyperventilating - after all, we've been led to believe that the gym at our office is a veritable wonderland for thieves! My purse has EVERYTHING in it - keys, money, my new passport, 4 different awesome lip glosses!!! NOOOOO!!!!
I checked the stall...my purse was gone. I quickly gathered my (remaining) belongings and went over to the gym office, hoping against hope that someone might have turned it in. Two employees were inside the office, chit-chatting (get back to work, ya lazy buggers!) with the door open, and, as I approached, I noticed my purse sitting on the floor beside one of the desks. Yay!!!
I was so relieved! Despite making it ridiculously easy for them to rob me, I somehow avoided being hit by the Mount Pleasant Club ring of thieves. Woohoo! My possessions were intact inside my purse.
Thank you, to whoever saved my purse for me. Your karma was just kicked up a huge notch.
------------------------------
*The Jays are doing well, started on the road...not doing as great at home, but doing OK. The Raptors ended their season this week and we had a good time, watching them win their last regular season game, but not making it into the playoffs...again..
**Dexter's sister is a bit of a potty-mouth...not as charming about it as I am, but a pretty good cusser nonetheless. Anyway. One of the episodes had a female character indicating her need to expel some urine by saying, "I need to take a squirt" and I thought it was such a charming & sophisticated phrase that I simply needed to use it as soon and as often as possible. You're welcome.
As you can probably surmise from that last stat, we looooove this fucking show.
And I now have a small crush on a soulless, fictional serial killer.
Just another day in the life of Patchoulia!
I've also been going to the gym quite a bit, after work. The gym I go to is at my office, which is obviously the epitome of convenience There are no excuses not to work out - except on those days when you forget your t-shirt at home, on top of the dryer - exercising in a metallic satiny blouse somehow just doesn't do it for me.
It's a pretty good facility, despite a distinct insufficiency of group fitness classes that appeal to me (Yogalates, anyone? WTF is a yogalate? Is that some kind of new-age coffee beverage?).
The gym has decent equipment in pretty good quantities - even during the "rush" periods, you can usually get on a machine or use the weights you need.
Best of all, it only costs $5 every 2 weeks and it's taken right off my paycheque!
Recently, the fitness centre staff have been sending out regular emails reminding members to lock up their stuff because they've been experiencing a lot of thefts lately. There are signs all over the locker room as well, reminding us to lock up our belongings or risk losing them.
The other night, I had to take a squirt** before working out, so I hauled all my crap (backpack, jacket, purse) into the bathroom stall with me before heading to the locker room. I did what I had to do, got changed, locked up my stuff (per posted warnings) and proceeded to get sweaty.
Later, after I'd finished working out, I opened my locker and realized that my purse wasn't there. Suddenly, it dawned on me that I'd left it hanging on the coat-hook in the bathroom stall. Then I started hyperventilating - after all, we've been led to believe that the gym at our office is a veritable wonderland for thieves! My purse has EVERYTHING in it - keys, money, my new passport, 4 different awesome lip glosses!!! NOOOOO!!!!
I checked the stall...my purse was gone. I quickly gathered my (remaining) belongings and went over to the gym office, hoping against hope that someone might have turned it in. Two employees were inside the office, chit-chatting (get back to work, ya lazy buggers!) with the door open, and, as I approached, I noticed my purse sitting on the floor beside one of the desks. Yay!!!
I was so relieved! Despite making it ridiculously easy for them to rob me, I somehow avoided being hit by the Mount Pleasant Club ring of thieves. Woohoo! My possessions were intact inside my purse.
Thank you, to whoever saved my purse for me. Your karma was just kicked up a huge notch.
------------------------------
*The Jays are doing well, started on the road...not doing as great at home, but doing OK. The Raptors ended their season this week and we had a good time, watching them win their last regular season game, but not making it into the playoffs...again..
**Dexter's sister is a bit of a potty-mouth...not as charming about it as I am, but a pretty good cusser nonetheless. Anyway. One of the episodes had a female character indicating her need to expel some urine by saying, "I need to take a squirt" and I thought it was such a charming & sophisticated phrase that I simply needed to use it as soon and as often as possible. You're welcome.
Saturday, April 03, 2010
Pasta w/Mushrooms & Spinach in Rosee Sauce
Last night, I created a delicious dish for dinner: Bruschetta alongside garlicky pasta w/mushrooms & spinach in rosee sauce.
Bruschetta was pretty basic....chopped up tomatoes, minced garlic, chopped fresh basil, minced red onion, olive oil, salt & pepper on fresh bread from the Cheese Boutique. Mmmmm.
For the pasta sauce, I sauteed the mushrooms & spinach for a few minutes (w/some garlic & chili flakes) until much of their inherent water evaporated and then set them aside. I added some olive oil to the same pan and sauteed some more garlic (I really do love garlic) and a medium-sized onion.
Once the onions started to soften, I added a large can of diced tomotoes, some tomato paste, oregano, chili flakes, chopped fresh basil & some black pepper. I let that simmer while the pasta was cooking.
Voila! Veggie rosee Sauce a la Patchoulia! It was quite divine!
Ingredients
mushrooms (to your taste)
spinach (to your taste)
1 onion
garlic (to your taste)
chili flakes (to your taste)
1 can diced tomatoes
tomato paste (1/2 small can)
3/4 tablespoon oregano
basil leaves, chopped (several)
olive oil for sauteeing
cream (half small carton)
Bruschetta was pretty basic....chopped up tomatoes, minced garlic, chopped fresh basil, minced red onion, olive oil, salt & pepper on fresh bread from the Cheese Boutique. Mmmmm.
For the pasta sauce, I sauteed the mushrooms & spinach for a few minutes (w/some garlic & chili flakes) until much of their inherent water evaporated and then set them aside. I added some olive oil to the same pan and sauteed some more garlic (I really do love garlic) and a medium-sized onion.
Once the onions started to soften, I added a large can of diced tomotoes, some tomato paste, oregano, chili flakes, chopped fresh basil & some black pepper. I let that simmer while the pasta was cooking.
When the pasta was almost ready, I pureed the sauce in the blender (in 2 batches) so it would mix seemlessly with the cream, then put it back in the pot on low heat and slowly stirred in the cream. It was a thing of beauty. Once the sauce had heated thoroughly, I stirred in the previously sauteed mushrooms & spinach.
Voila! Veggie rosee Sauce a la Patchoulia! It was quite divine!
(My food pornography-phography skills need a lot of work, so I had to steal a reasonable facsimile picture off the internet...)
Ingredients
mushrooms (to your taste)
spinach (to your taste)
1 onion
garlic (to your taste)
chili flakes (to your taste)
1 can diced tomatoes
tomato paste (1/2 small can)
3/4 tablespoon oregano
basil leaves, chopped (several)
olive oil for sauteeing
cream (half small carton)
What does heaven taste like, you ask?
Ah, Good Friday. What's so good about it? We get the day off work, of course! (I know, I know, I'm going to hell...that's not news...).
I left work a bit early yesterday (thank you, boss!) and took a nice long walk...I was WAY too hot, though. I definitely didn't need a coat!
Along the way I picked up some gifts @ Chapters and then picked up some mail at the post office that required my signature. The delivery turned out to be my passport, which was somewhat surprising, since I'd mailed in my renewal form only a couple of weeks ago - that was fast!
Incidentally, my new passport contains the worst, most hideous picture I've ever seen. You might think I'm exagerrating, but you could not be more wrong. When I say this is the worst picture I've ever seen, I'm not even limiting the comparison to pictures of myself - I can confidently proclaim that this is the most putrid picture ever taken of anyone, anywhere in the world, in the history of the universe.
After I ran my errands, I walked home and we took Kuda to the dog park for some frolicking (stick-throwing, trail-running, doggy-friend-making etc.)
Upon returning home, we commenced our daily debate on what we were going to have for dinner. I swear to god, if I didn't love eating so much, I'd survive by ingesting nutrient-rich pills or subsist on those meal-replacement shakes, and be done with the whole, stupid decision-making process/daily argument.
I won't bore you with all the meals & restaurants that were discussed & rejected before we finally made our decision, which was to go out to eat. We chose Classico Pizza & Pasta, in our neighbourhood (it's located in Bloor West Village, near Jane, for those of you in Toronto).
We've eaten there a few times and enjoyed it a lot. Their pizza is reeeally good and they also have a variety of pasta dishes. They also serve one particular appetizer that we adore...I can't remember what it's called, but it's like a spring roll filled with cheese that you dip in a tart vinaigrette. Sounds like an odd combo, but the different flavours complement each other very well and it is AMAZING! Unfortunately, it wasn't on the menu last night (Poop seems to recall that it was previously on a list of specials inserted into the menu, so perhaps they only serve it occasionally...I hope it comes back!).
When we arrived, we realized that they'd opened their patio (Yay! Patio season!) which effectively doubled their capacity...good thing, too, cuz it was packed! We hadn't realized that they have live music on Thursday nights...I don't know the musician's name, but he was playing guitar & singing (later joined by a sax player); they were pretty good and it created a nice ambience.
It was a little chilly on the patio, but we had our fleeces on, so it wasn't too bad. Besides which, there were 2 tables full of families inside the restaurant with their unleashed (and, by "unleashed", I don't mean "let loose", I mean "not on leashes", as I would prefer), screeching children running rampant and I had no interest in being anywhere near that.
We ordered a couple of glasses of Shiraz (it was their "featured" wine that night, which worked out well, since it's my fave!). Poop ordered a Greek salad to start and I decided on the soup of the day. It was tomato something or other...not worth remembering...it was very bland, I barely touched it...to their credit, the server offered to take it back and bring me the other soup to try, but I wasn't interested.
The pizza was delicious (tomato sauce, tons of broccoli, sundried tomatoes, goat cheese); we ended up eating half and taking the rest home, which made for a delicious lunch the next day!
As we ate, I fell victim to the power of suggestion; I witnessed several other patrons receiving fancy coffee (with whipped cream on top!) and I simply needed to have one, too (or I might have died, you understand). Poop decided to order creme brulee for dessert; I've never had creme brulee, but it always looks like so much fun when they set it on fire - and the end result is always so lovely to look at. :)
I received my fancy coffee (with whipped cream & Bailey's) and Poop got his creme brulee (they didn't bring the blow-torch to the table, which was disappointing).
My coffee was delectable and I was convinced to try Poop's dessert, after much pestering. How was the creme brulee....?
Let me put it this way: If you believe heaven exists, this is what it would taste like.
I attempted some trickery....I mentioned that I thought I detected poison & it would be better for Poop if he didn't eat any more of it - I was, in essence, saving his life - but he didn't fall for it.
*sigh*
I gave it a shot.
I love you, creme brulee.
Ooooh thinkin' about all our younger years, there was only you & me, we were young & wild & custardy....**
------------
**Bryan Adams' ode to creme brulee
I left work a bit early yesterday (thank you, boss!) and took a nice long walk...I was WAY too hot, though. I definitely didn't need a coat!
Along the way I picked up some gifts @ Chapters and then picked up some mail at the post office that required my signature. The delivery turned out to be my passport, which was somewhat surprising, since I'd mailed in my renewal form only a couple of weeks ago - that was fast!
After I ran my errands, I walked home and we took Kuda to the dog park for some frolicking (stick-throwing, trail-running, doggy-friend-making etc.)
Upon returning home, we commenced our daily debate on what we were going to have for dinner. I swear to god, if I didn't love eating so much, I'd survive by ingesting nutrient-rich pills or subsist on those meal-replacement shakes, and be done with the whole, stupid decision-making process/daily argument.
We've eaten there a few times and enjoyed it a lot. Their pizza is reeeally good and they also have a variety of pasta dishes. They also serve one particular appetizer that we adore...I can't remember what it's called, but it's like a spring roll filled with cheese that you dip in a tart vinaigrette. Sounds like an odd combo, but the different flavours complement each other very well and it is AMAZING! Unfortunately, it wasn't on the menu last night (Poop seems to recall that it was previously on a list of specials inserted into the menu, so perhaps they only serve it occasionally...I hope it comes back!).
When we arrived, we realized that they'd opened their patio (Yay! Patio season!) which effectively doubled their capacity...good thing, too, cuz it was packed! We hadn't realized that they have live music on Thursday nights...I don't know the musician's name, but he was playing guitar & singing (later joined by a sax player); they were pretty good and it created a nice ambience.
It was a little chilly on the patio, but we had our fleeces on, so it wasn't too bad. Besides which, there were 2 tables full of families inside the restaurant with their unleashed (and, by "unleashed", I don't mean "let loose", I mean "not on leashes", as I would prefer), screeching children running rampant and I had no interest in being anywhere near that.
We ordered a couple of glasses of Shiraz (it was their "featured" wine that night, which worked out well, since it's my fave!). Poop ordered a Greek salad to start and I decided on the soup of the day. It was tomato something or other...not worth remembering...it was very bland, I barely touched it...to their credit, the server offered to take it back and bring me the other soup to try, but I wasn't interested.
The pizza was delicious (tomato sauce, tons of broccoli, sundried tomatoes, goat cheese); we ended up eating half and taking the rest home, which made for a delicious lunch the next day!
I received my fancy coffee (with whipped cream & Bailey's) and Poop got his creme brulee (they didn't bring the blow-torch to the table, which was disappointing).
Let me put it this way: If you believe heaven exists, this is what it would taste like.
I attempted some trickery....I mentioned that I thought I detected poison & it would be better for Poop if he didn't eat any more of it - I was, in essence, saving his life - but he didn't fall for it.
*sigh*
I gave it a shot.
I love you, creme brulee.
Ooooh thinkin' about all our younger years, there was only you & me, we were young & wild & custardy....**
------------
**Bryan Adams' ode to creme brulee
Thursday, April 01, 2010
Julie & Julia & Julia
We watched the movie Julie & Julia on the weekend. I was definitely disappointed, I was expecting more. Meryl Streep's performance was, as usual, beyond reproach, but, overall, I found the film to be pretty dull. I didn't become emotionally invested in the characters, so I didn't really care what happened to them. On a positive note, it was quite lovely to look at, the portion of the film focusing on Julia Child (set in France) was particularly beautiful.
One thing that happens to me when I watch a film or TV show whose characters are based on (or allegedly portraying) "real" people is that I become sort of obsessed with finding out the "real" story. Historically, very few filmic portrayals of famous figures are done without some degree of artistic license, and I find myself wanting to know more, needing clarity as to what actually happened, wondering where they ended up etc etc.
At the end of Julie & Julia I immediately reached for the computer to find out how Julia Child ended up becoming the famous chef & TV personality "Julia Child" (the film focused on a brief period in her life when she first moved to France, learned to cook "the French way" at the Cordon Bleu and collaborated on her first cookbook).
I also became curious about the "Julie" of the title, who became quite well known back in 2002 for her food blog, the "Julie/Julia Project". If you've read the book on which the film was based, or seen the movie, you already know the story: In her 2002-2003 blog, Julie Powell chronicled her endeavours to prepare each of the recipes contained within Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking in a 1-year period.
My preliminary internet search for Julie Powell turned up a plethora of ink* on the author & her 2nd book, Cleaving, that had been released in the latter half of 2009.
----------------------------------------
*Can we still refer to written press as "ink" even if there's no ink involved and it only exists in cyberspace? Ladies & gentlemen, my pointless conundrum/aside of the day....applause, applause, applause...
----------------------------------
In reading the (mostly) scathing reviews of her new book and profuse indictments of the author herself (moreso for her attitude and "shocking" stories she reveals in Cleaving, than for her writing) I became intrigued. The Julie Powell being described in these pieces - foul-mouthed, unapologetically self-centered, brazenly adulterous - bears little resemblance to the bland, saccharine-sweet, semi-endearing, pathetic, oft-victimized Julie Powell portrayed in the film. The real Julie Powell sounded eminently more appealing and my interest was piqued.
I figured that I should start from the beginning and hoped that the original "Julie/Julia Project" blog was extant on the internet. I wasn't sure it would be, considering its contents were made into a book (you know...cow, milk, free $$$...etc.) However, a bit of searching revealed that it is still out there and set upon my quest to read the entire project, from beginning to end...which I accomplished in less than 48 hours.
You could say I was a trifle obsessed.
I'm not sure why I found it such compelling reading. But, I suppose it shouldn't be all that surprising, considering its popularity during its original incarnation (apparently becoming one of salon.com's most visited blogs ever, with hundreds of thousands of hits during that first year alone).
I will confess, I did speed-read parts of it...and, by speed-read, I mean, I only skimmed certain portions. Since I have no interest in French cuisine, either preparing it or consuming it, the sections devoted to the minutiae of the recipes - ingredients, cooking methods etc. - were quite tedious & extremely repetitive (butter, anyone?).
Besides which, consuming all of that French cooking (writing) in one sitting can't be good for one's arteries.
So, as I read through the blog entries, I did skip what I considered to be the more rote sections and went straight to what I considered the meat of the saga: The successes & failures, trials & tribulations of Julie Powell in both her kitchen & her life.
I can see why so many people became fans of the blog, it was quite entertaining. And, other than her penchant for using the word "phase" when she meant to be using the verb "faze" (as you know, this type of faux pas is anathema to me), I thought it was exceptionally well-written.
I actually found her voice as a writer to be alarmingly similar to my own: Self-deprecating (yet superior), self-aware (yet self-absorbed), witty (yet whiny) and replete with mother-fucking expletives. Odd dichotomies, to be sure, but, as the douchebags at my old job were wont to say: It is what it is.
Additional similarities became apparent when I visited her current blog "What Could Happen?" (http://juliepowell.blogspot.com/). I was immediately taken aback by the subtitle of the blog: "Musings from a Soiled & Narcisstic Whore" - because I had literally *just* hung up the phone after speaking with a gentleman about pre-planning my funeral and I had told him that I wanted almost that EXACT phrase carved into my tombstone! What are the odds??!
Just kidding. I'm not pre-planning my funeral (I'm totally getting cremated).
But....whore? Yes. I have been characterized as such.
Narcisstic? Who me? Me me mememememe!!! Look at MEEEEEEEEE!!
Soiled? Hmm. I'd say spoiled. Or rotten. But, close enough.
Anyway...
I'm definitely going to read Cleaving, despite the plethora of negative reviews I came across. I have to assume that the detractors are puritanical, morally superior, vegetarians: Who *doesn't* want to read a sordid tale of extra-marital S & M, interspersed with first-hand accounts of what it takes to become a butcher?! That's gold, Jerry...gold!!
The bottom line result of this week's obsession is that I plan to try more new things in the kitchen. And not be thwarted when I see an unfamiliar ingredient listed in a recipe (So what if I only use it ONCE?! Big deal!)
And I will share these endeavours with the world...why not...if she can do it, I can do it!
Plus, I desperately need to get working on a project of some kind, so that those business cards that I had printed up with my title listed as "Project Manager" won't just big fat falsehoods. I hate handing out falsehoods when I'm networking.
Until tomorrow, lovelies!
~ Julia Patchoulia
One thing that happens to me when I watch a film or TV show whose characters are based on (or allegedly portraying) "real" people is that I become sort of obsessed with finding out the "real" story. Historically, very few filmic portrayals of famous figures are done without some degree of artistic license, and I find myself wanting to know more, needing clarity as to what actually happened, wondering where they ended up etc etc.
At the end of Julie & Julia I immediately reached for the computer to find out how Julia Child ended up becoming the famous chef & TV personality "Julia Child" (the film focused on a brief period in her life when she first moved to France, learned to cook "the French way" at the Cordon Bleu and collaborated on her first cookbook).
I also became curious about the "Julie" of the title, who became quite well known back in 2002 for her food blog, the "Julie/Julia Project". If you've read the book on which the film was based, or seen the movie, you already know the story: In her 2002-2003 blog, Julie Powell chronicled her endeavours to prepare each of the recipes contained within Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking in a 1-year period.
My preliminary internet search for Julie Powell turned up a plethora of ink* on the author & her 2nd book, Cleaving, that had been released in the latter half of 2009.
----------------------------------------
*Can we still refer to written press as "ink" even if there's no ink involved and it only exists in cyberspace? Ladies & gentlemen, my pointless conundrum/aside of the day....applause, applause, applause...
----------------------------------
In reading the (mostly) scathing reviews of her new book and profuse indictments of the author herself (moreso for her attitude and "shocking" stories she reveals in Cleaving, than for her writing) I became intrigued. The Julie Powell being described in these pieces - foul-mouthed, unapologetically self-centered, brazenly adulterous - bears little resemblance to the bland, saccharine-sweet, semi-endearing, pathetic, oft-victimized Julie Powell portrayed in the film. The real Julie Powell sounded eminently more appealing and my interest was piqued.
I figured that I should start from the beginning and hoped that the original "Julie/Julia Project" blog was extant on the internet. I wasn't sure it would be, considering its contents were made into a book (you know...cow, milk, free $$$...etc.) However, a bit of searching revealed that it is still out there and set upon my quest to read the entire project, from beginning to end...which I accomplished in less than 48 hours.
You could say I was a trifle obsessed.
I'm not sure why I found it such compelling reading. But, I suppose it shouldn't be all that surprising, considering its popularity during its original incarnation (apparently becoming one of salon.com's most visited blogs ever, with hundreds of thousands of hits during that first year alone).
I will confess, I did speed-read parts of it...and, by speed-read, I mean, I only skimmed certain portions. Since I have no interest in French cuisine, either preparing it or consuming it, the sections devoted to the minutiae of the recipes - ingredients, cooking methods etc. - were quite tedious & extremely repetitive (butter, anyone?).
Besides which, consuming all of that French cooking (writing) in one sitting can't be good for one's arteries.
So, as I read through the blog entries, I did skip what I considered to be the more rote sections and went straight to what I considered the meat of the saga: The successes & failures, trials & tribulations of Julie Powell in both her kitchen & her life.
I can see why so many people became fans of the blog, it was quite entertaining. And, other than her penchant for using the word "phase" when she meant to be using the verb "faze" (as you know, this type of faux pas is anathema to me), I thought it was exceptionally well-written.
I actually found her voice as a writer to be alarmingly similar to my own: Self-deprecating (yet superior), self-aware (yet self-absorbed), witty (yet whiny) and replete with mother-fucking expletives. Odd dichotomies, to be sure, but, as the douchebags at my old job were wont to say: It is what it is.
Additional similarities became apparent when I visited her current blog "What Could Happen?" (http://juliepowell.blogspot.com/). I was immediately taken aback by the subtitle of the blog: "Musings from a Soiled & Narcisstic Whore" - because I had literally *just* hung up the phone after speaking with a gentleman about pre-planning my funeral and I had told him that I wanted almost that EXACT phrase carved into my tombstone! What are the odds??!
Just kidding. I'm not pre-planning my funeral (I'm totally getting cremated).
But....whore? Yes. I have been characterized as such.
Narcisstic? Who me? Me me mememememe!!! Look at MEEEEEEEEE!!
Soiled? Hmm. I'd say spoiled. Or rotten. But, close enough.
Anyway...
The bottom line result of this week's obsession is that I plan to try more new things in the kitchen. And not be thwarted when I see an unfamiliar ingredient listed in a recipe (So what if I only use it ONCE?! Big deal!)
And I will share these endeavours with the world...why not...if she can do it, I can do it!
Plus, I desperately need to get working on a project of some kind, so that those business cards that I had printed up with my title listed as "Project Manager" won't just big fat falsehoods. I hate handing out falsehoods when I'm networking.
Until tomorrow, lovelies!
~ Julia Patchoulia
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
What have I been up to? How nice of you to ask!
Despite my recent, prolonged absence from blogging, I haven't really been doing anything all that exciting...so I don't have any excuse for not posting. I suppose it does makes sense, though; if I had been living on the edge, having an amazing, crazy time (and other Aerosmith-song-title-inspired phrases/adjectives) I would have had more to report, wouldn't I?!
I haven't done any travelling, haven't gone to any concerts..I think I went to a couple of Raptors games that were either entirely forgettable or were so painful to witness that I've successfully blocked them from my memory.
We've had a lot of beautiful weather this month and we've spent a lot of time with Kuda (we had sole custody of Her Highness the Dog for a whole week whilst O & A were in Barbados...Kuda, Poop & I all enjoyed this period tremendously!)
Pic #1 Kuda playing with her new friend in the park.
Pic #2 Kuda correctly deducing that the only way to get ahold of the tennis ball that Poop had trapped under his running shoe, was to dig it out (she's so smart)!
My friend/co-worker & her hubby had us over for dinner on Saturday night, which was great fun, even though I was a little offended that her cats didn't seem to like me that much. She made shrimp pasta with cream sauce, which was decandently delicious. The wine was plentiful (and,obviously, also delicious). We had a lovely evening!
I haven't done any travelling, haven't gone to any concerts..I think I went to a couple of Raptors games that were either entirely forgettable or were so painful to witness that I've successfully blocked them from my memory.
We've had a lot of beautiful weather this month and we've spent a lot of time with Kuda (we had sole custody of Her Highness the Dog for a whole week whilst O & A were in Barbados...Kuda, Poop & I all enjoyed this period tremendously!)
Pic #1 Kuda playing with her new friend in the park.
Pic #2 Kuda correctly deducing that the only way to get ahold of the tennis ball that Poop had trapped under his running shoe, was to dig it out (she's so smart)!
This past Saturday we did all kinds of cleaning. I suppose you could call it spring cleaning, since it is spring and since we went beyond the usual wipe shit down/vacuum shit up routine, which is always tremendously gratifying for me. I even enlisted Poop to polish some silver...once I'd taught him how to do it, he did a very good job!
My friend/co-worker & her hubby had us over for dinner on Saturday night, which was great fun, even though I was a little offended that her cats didn't seem to like me that much. She made shrimp pasta with cream sauce, which was decandently delicious. The wine was plentiful (and,obviously, also delicious). We had a lovely evening!
Monday, March 29, 2010
"The Greatest Story of Our Time"
Holy crap, I haven't posted anything for over a month! I had no idea!
There was no outcry whatsoever from my fans, which is somewhat disheartening, but, never fear, I'm back!
Today, I'd like to discuss the characterization of the TV show "Lost" as the greatest story of our time.
I was watching the news this morning before I left for work and a commercial came on advertising "Lost" and described it thusly. "Lost: The Greatest Story of Our Time".
You may have noticed that fans of Lost tend to be, shall we say, a trifle over-enthusiastic about the whole thing. Their level of commitment to this fictitious realm borders on stalker-like obsession. I can only assume that the person who wrote the copy for this ad is of the Lost-festishist ilk.
I suppose the idea would be more palatable if there were a quantifier or two included in the prounouncement. For example: The greatest, fictional, island-based story of our time, as acted out on on ABC TV. That's a little more plausible, in my mind.
Somehow, I just can't buy into the notion that a television program (especially one that boasts a character called "Smoke Monster") could truly be the greatest story of our time.
*shrug*
Then again, who am I to criticize TV obsession? Deep down, I genuinely believe that Tony Soprano is still out there, whackin' folks & scarfin' back gabagool. Don't even try to tell me any different.
There was no outcry whatsoever from my fans, which is somewhat disheartening, but, never fear, I'm back!
Today, I'd like to discuss the characterization of the TV show "Lost" as the greatest story of our time.
I was watching the news this morning before I left for work and a commercial came on advertising "Lost" and described it thusly. "Lost: The Greatest Story of Our Time".
I've never been a fan of Lost. I watched the first 1 or 2 episodes, quickly grew bored and never returned to the mysterious island. Had I known it was THE GREATEST STORY OF OUR TIME, I assure you, I would not have made such a mistake! (You may have noticed my affection for hyperbolic sarcasm. I can only hope the folks describing Lost as the greatest story of our time are similarly fond of said literary convention).
I suppose the idea would be more palatable if there were a quantifier or two included in the prounouncement. For example: The greatest, fictional, island-based story of our time, as acted out on on ABC TV. That's a little more plausible, in my mind.
Somehow, I just can't buy into the notion that a television program (especially one that boasts a character called "Smoke Monster") could truly be the greatest story of our time.
*shrug*
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
One of these things is not like the other....
Every day on my way to/from work & the subway, I pass by a dollar store on Bloor street.
I don't really like dollar stores, not just because of the cheap quality of the merchandise, but because of the persistent, unique, offensive "dollar store smell". It's an olfactory explosion, present in every dollar store I've ever entered, reminiscent (Get it? ReminiSCENT?) of poverty, curry & sweat.
While attending university, I frequented dollar stores, along with every other cash-strapped student. Since living in Toronto, however, I think I've only set foot in one once: I blew a flip-flop at work one day and hoped to be able to locate a suitable, inexpensive replacement set of shoes, since I was on my way to a Jays game and didn't have access to any other functional footwear. Unfortunately, I was too revolted by the dollar-store's omnipresent odour to do any browsing and ended up using packing tape to McGuyver my busted flip-flops back together (I know what you're thinking, my ingenuity knows no bounds...you're very perceptive...).
The other day, I walked by the neighbourhood dollar store and noticed a big sign in the window indicating 50% off the ENTIRE store, with a few exceptions:
If you can't quite decipher this, it says, "Except: Drinks, Candies, African Products...etc."
What?!?
It's the "etc." that's throwing me off here. If you can explain to me the common thread between these 3 categories of items, it would be much appreciated. I've been wracking my brain and have been unable to come up with anything.
Interestingly, I walked by the store this morning and the sign was gone...either their big sale is over or they spied me, last week, surreptitiously snapping this pic and realized something was amiss.
While attending university, I frequented dollar stores, along with every other cash-strapped student. Since living in Toronto, however, I think I've only set foot in one once: I blew a flip-flop at work one day and hoped to be able to locate a suitable, inexpensive replacement set of shoes, since I was on my way to a Jays game and didn't have access to any other functional footwear. Unfortunately, I was too revolted by the dollar-store's omnipresent odour to do any browsing and ended up using packing tape to McGuyver my busted flip-flops back together (I know what you're thinking, my ingenuity knows no bounds...you're very perceptive...).
The other day, I walked by the neighbourhood dollar store and noticed a big sign in the window indicating 50% off the ENTIRE store, with a few exceptions:
If you can't quite decipher this, it says, "Except: Drinks, Candies, African Products...etc."
What?!?
It's the "etc." that's throwing me off here. If you can explain to me the common thread between these 3 categories of items, it would be much appreciated. I've been wracking my brain and have been unable to come up with anything.
Interestingly, I walked by the store this morning and the sign was gone...either their big sale is over or they spied me, last week, surreptitiously snapping this pic and realized something was amiss.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
The etymology of language...
I'm a big fan of grammar.
"Eats, Shoots & Leaves" is another good one.
I'm always somewhat conflicted about the evolution of language: Is it really evolution or is it devolution? I contend that any word whose useage is modified in such a way that it reduces clarity of meaning is not evolution.
Case in point, earlier today, Poop mentioned that something would be completed in a "promp" manner.
Me: Did you just say..promp?
Poop: Yeah. Promp. What?
Me: That's not even a word.
Poop: Of course it is! It's in the definictionary!
Happy Stupid Bowl Sunday!
I am currently reading "Woe Is I" subtitled "The Grammarphobe's Guide to Better English in Plain English" (which means I'm not really this book's target demographic, but I still enjoy reading the tips & mneumonic tricks to improving one's grammar contained therein).
"Eats, Shoots & Leaves" is another good one.
I'm always somewhat conflicted about the evolution of language: Is it really evolution or is it devolution? I contend that any word whose useage is modified in such a way that it reduces clarity of meaning is not evolution.
Case in point, earlier today, Poop mentioned that something would be completed in a "promp" manner.
Me: Did you just say..promp?
Poop: Yeah. Promp. What?
Me: That's not even a word.
Poop: Of course it is! It's in the definictionary!
Happy Stupid Bowl Sunday!
Friday, February 05, 2010
Currently... (Theme Stolen from Margot, the Crafty Blogger from PEI)
Eating: Greek pasta salad from the office cafeteria (with the barf-inducing olives carefully picked out)
Making: This category doesn't really apply to me, since I'm not a crafty crafter. But, I suppose I could say, I'm making....the world a better place with my presence? :)
Wearing: Pants. Full Tilt poker fleece. Socks (I loathe socks).
Watching: I'm at work, so I'm not watching much, except my back, in these cut-throat economic times. But, in general, TV I'm currently enjoying in my life would be Modern Family, Mad Men & Drop Dead Diva.
Reading: Open (Andre Agassi), Rules of Prey (John Sandford), The Book of Basketball (Bill Simmons)
Missing: Gill & her spawn, Paula & her violent dreams, Tommy James & those damn Shondells
Thursday, February 04, 2010
WebMD is EVIL!
WebMD (and sites like it) that allow people to type in their symptoms and receive a diagnosis are bad for our collective health (both physical & mental).
People use these sites to identify their health issues rather than visiting a doctor, which is obviously a bad idea!
"Naw, I don't need to see a doctor, WebMD tells me I'm fine!"
And for people who have a propensity towards paranoia, this type of thing is extremely dangerous....case in point....
A few weeks ago, Poop declared, "I think I have tuberculosis."
Me: You what?
Poop: I think I have tuberculosis. I have all the symptoms.
Me: Let me guess...WedMD?
Poop (shamefully): Yes.
Me: Let me reassure you, you do NOT have tuberculosis. You were probably vaccinated against it when you were a child. I could be wrong, but, I think it was pretty much eradicated in the western world at the turn of the 20th century.
The conversation ended, but I'm not sure I convinced him. He wandered off muttering "tuberculosis" under his breath.
I've banned him from using WebMD in the future.
And, please, see your doctor.
People use these sites to identify their health issues rather than visiting a doctor, which is obviously a bad idea!
"Naw, I don't need to see a doctor, WebMD tells me I'm fine!"
And for people who have a propensity towards paranoia, this type of thing is extremely dangerous....case in point....
A few weeks ago, Poop declared, "I think I have tuberculosis."
Me: You what?
Poop: I think I have tuberculosis. I have all the symptoms.
Me: Let me guess...WedMD?
Me: Let me reassure you, you do NOT have tuberculosis. You were probably vaccinated against it when you were a child. I could be wrong, but, I think it was pretty much eradicated in the western world at the turn of the 20th century.
The conversation ended, but I'm not sure I convinced him. He wandered off muttering "tuberculosis" under his breath.
I've banned him from using WebMD in the future.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
I am the next Picasso.
I believe I might be the next Picasso. Why? Because I have an artistic flair and am obviously insane!
-------------------------------------------
The other day, at work, I was flipping through one of my notebooks to determine if there was anything important in it that should be transferred to a new notebook before I tossed out the old one.
I came across something very disturbing.
A pen-drawing (undoubtedly my work) that I have no recollection of creating.
I studied it for a little while, in hopes that its meaning might become clear...but, alas, no such luck.
I can't imagine what prompted me to birth this piece of shi....artistic expression.
I simply cannot fathom what purpose it could have ever served!
You can't tell from this pic, but, he's sporting a "not-quite goatee" (a flashy moustache, twirled at the ends, with a below-the-chin-only beard, ending in a point...I'm sure there's a name for this particular facial hair style, but I'm unfamiliar with it).
I've always believed that a goatee is identifiable & defined by the fact that the moustache hair and the chin hair are attached...am I right?
I'm also worried about this guy (whom I've christened "Steve")...the thickness & uniform width of his right leg suggests a disturbing illness...treetrunkappendagemia (incurable, from my understanding).
The fact that my mind could produce such a bizarre composition truly speaks volumes about the depths of my insanity.
You be the judge. And if you have ANY suggestions as to why I might have brought this fellow to life or what his story might be...PLEASE feel free to share your ideas!
-------------------------------------------
The other day, at work, I was flipping through one of my notebooks to determine if there was anything important in it that should be transferred to a new notebook before I tossed out the old one.
I came across something very disturbing.
A pen-drawing (undoubtedly my work) that I have no recollection of creating.
I studied it for a little while, in hopes that its meaning might become clear...but, alas, no such luck.
I can't imagine what prompted me to birth this piece of shi....artistic expression.
I simply cannot fathom what purpose it could have ever served!
You can't tell from this pic, but, he's sporting a "not-quite goatee" (a flashy moustache, twirled at the ends, with a below-the-chin-only beard, ending in a point...I'm sure there's a name for this particular facial hair style, but I'm unfamiliar with it).
I've always believed that a goatee is identifiable & defined by the fact that the moustache hair and the chin hair are attached...am I right?
I'm also worried about this guy (whom I've christened "Steve")...the thickness & uniform width of his right leg suggests a disturbing illness...treetrunkappendagemia (incurable, from my understanding).
Click on the picture to enlarge & to enjoy all of Steve's intricate details.
You be the judge. And if you have ANY suggestions as to why I might have brought this fellow to life or what his story might be...PLEASE feel free to share your ideas!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Dear MLSE
An Open Letter to Maple Leaf Sports & Entertainment (owners of the Toronto Maple Leafs & the Toronto Raptors):
I just wanted to commend you, as an organization and your unwavering commitment to the fans.
For those of you who don't know, the Raptors' organization is having a "Fan Appreciation Night", occurring February 3rd. And their way of expressing their appreciation for the fanbase is via an exciting, half-time performance by a contemporary musical artist....(wait for it)....
Not to degrade the artist known as Vanilla Ice, but, the last time he was popular/relevant, the Raptors were still FIVE YEARS AWAY FROM EXISTENCE.
Maple Leafs Sports & Entertainment: If you want to express your appreciation to your fans, perhaps you should choose a performer who is popular NOW...or was popular--oh I don't know--in the last decade?
Or, since this is the NBA's lone Canadian team, how about showcasing a Canadian band that is up & coming now?
No?
OK, so, "Canadian" obviously wasn't one of the parameters when you were making your choice. Nor was "current" one of the criteria. I could suggest that "kitsch appeal" was your main requirement, but that's really reaching.
If you have something against current bands, why not pick an act that was popular, exactly, fifteen years ago? The Raptors came into existence in '95, you could have chosen a performer who hit it big that year and you could have formulated a marketing tie-in with a band that was popular the year the Raptors were born!
(I'm pretty sure Hootie & the Blowfish are available...)
The point is, Vanilla Ice, is, simply, an embarrassing choice!
It's embarrassing now, to even discuss!
And it's going to be horribly, painfully embarrassing that night--even more embarrassing than the team that the Raptors are playing that day! Yes, it's going to be more embarrassing than the 2009-2010 Nets (and I didn't think that was possible).
The fans aren't going to be in to it..because...well...it's VANILLA ICE...and it's not 1990!
And it's going to be embarrasing for Mr. Ice...he's got to know how ridiculous he is!
Then again, a precedent was set by the NBA last year (specifically, the Denver Nuggets) when Vanilla performed a half-time gig at a Nuggets/Hornets game (see evidence below).
Thanks, a lot, Denver.
I feel bad for him.
I feel bad for the fans.
I feel bad for those of us who were in high school when "Ice, Ice Baby" came out and, as such, still know all the words to that insidious ditty, despite our best efforts to excise it from our minds.
I can't decide if I want to be there for this train wreck or not...on one hand, as previously mentioned, I'm embarrassed.
But, on the other hand, if a 3-legged talking dog comes to your city, you don't miss the meet 'n' greet!
I'd be a fool to miss this spectacle!
See ya there!
I just wanted to commend you, as an organization and your unwavering commitment to the fans.
For those of you who don't know, the Raptors' organization is having a "Fan Appreciation Night", occurring February 3rd. And their way of expressing their appreciation for the fanbase is via an exciting, half-time performance by a contemporary musical artist....(wait for it)....
For those of you who weren't alive in 1990, that's Vanilla Ice (né Robert Van Winkle).
Not to degrade the artist known as Vanilla Ice, but, the last time he was popular/relevant, the Raptors were still FIVE YEARS AWAY FROM EXISTENCE.
Maple Leafs Sports & Entertainment: If you want to express your appreciation to your fans, perhaps you should choose a performer who is popular NOW...or was popular--oh I don't know--in the last decade?
Or, since this is the NBA's lone Canadian team, how about showcasing a Canadian band that is up & coming now?
No?
OK, so, "Canadian" obviously wasn't one of the parameters when you were making your choice. Nor was "current" one of the criteria. I could suggest that "kitsch appeal" was your main requirement, but that's really reaching.
If you have something against current bands, why not pick an act that was popular, exactly, fifteen years ago? The Raptors came into existence in '95, you could have chosen a performer who hit it big that year and you could have formulated a marketing tie-in with a band that was popular the year the Raptors were born!
The point is, Vanilla Ice, is, simply, an embarrassing choice!
It's embarrassing now, to even discuss!
And it's going to be horribly, painfully embarrassing that night--even more embarrassing than the team that the Raptors are playing that day! Yes, it's going to be more embarrassing than the 2009-2010 Nets (and I didn't think that was possible).
The fans aren't going to be in to it..because...well...it's VANILLA ICE...and it's not 1990!
And it's going to be embarrasing for Mr. Ice...he's got to know how ridiculous he is!
Then again, a precedent was set by the NBA last year (specifically, the Denver Nuggets) when Vanilla performed a half-time gig at a Nuggets/Hornets game (see evidence below).
Thanks, a lot, Denver.
I feel bad for him.
I feel bad for the fans.
I feel bad for those of us who were in high school when "Ice, Ice Baby" came out and, as such, still know all the words to that insidious ditty, despite our best efforts to excise it from our minds.
I can't decide if I want to be there for this train wreck or not...on one hand, as previously mentioned, I'm embarrassed.
But, on the other hand, if a 3-legged talking dog comes to your city, you don't miss the meet 'n' greet!
I'd be a fool to miss this spectacle!
See ya there!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Regarding My Favourite Movie: I Am Torn
I'm not experiencing indecision on the identity of my favourite movie...it is and will likely always be "Harold & Maude". I absolutely adored it from my very first viewing (in 1997) and have loved it ever since.
It is beautiful & brilliant in every conceivable way...story, writing, performances, cinematography, music...everything is perfection!
It's the music I want to address.
All of the songs on the soundtrack are by Cat Stevens (this film came out in '71, so he was still "Cat" back then).
My favourite song is "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out" which was written especially for the movie and can be interpreted as the unofficial "theme" song of the film. It makes me laugh, it makes me cry, it makes me dance & it inspires me--it's that good!
Recently, I realized that its formerly feline songwriter/performer, now known as Yusuf Islam, had given T-Mobile the rights to "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out" to use in a commercial.
ARGH!
And therein lies my dilemma.
I don't even care about the whole "selling out" aspect, that's not what bothers me.
What I simply cannot reconcile is as follows:
On one hand, every time it comes on, it makes me happy...I sing along enthusiastically! I smile!
On the other hand, a generation (or two) are only going to know this fantastic ditty as the theme to a T-Mobile commercial and that is heart-breaking!
I can't believe that a Cat Stevens-related trauma is causing me such distress.
It is beautiful & brilliant in every conceivable way...story, writing, performances, cinematography, music...everything is perfection!
It's the music I want to address.
All of the songs on the soundtrack are by Cat Stevens (this film came out in '71, so he was still "Cat" back then).
My favourite song is "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out" which was written especially for the movie and can be interpreted as the unofficial "theme" song of the film. It makes me laugh, it makes me cry, it makes me dance & it inspires me--it's that good!
Recently, I realized that its formerly feline songwriter/performer, now known as Yusuf Islam, had given T-Mobile the rights to "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out" to use in a commercial.
ARGH!
And therein lies my dilemma.
I don't even care about the whole "selling out" aspect, that's not what bothers me.
What I simply cannot reconcile is as follows:
On one hand, every time it comes on, it makes me happy...I sing along enthusiastically! I smile!
On the other hand, a generation (or two) are only going to know this fantastic ditty as the theme to a T-Mobile commercial and that is heart-breaking!
I can't believe that a Cat Stevens-related trauma is causing me such distress.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Baseball & Basketball Are DEAD in Toronto!!
Before anyone gets pissy with me in reaction to the inflammatory subject line of this post, please realize that the title is meant to be taken with a gargantuan grain of sodium chloride.
The other day, ESPN’s Bill Simmons
(aka “The Sports Guy”) revealed the contents of an email he had received from a Toronto sports fan, "expressing..dismay that (A) Roy Halladay was traded, and (B) Chris Bosh is a mortal lock to be playing somewhere else next season. By August…Canada's best non-hockey player would be either Hedo Turkoglu or Aaron Hill.”
Thanks, Sports Guy!
This gives me the opportunity to address something that’s been sticking in my craw for months. (In case you’re wondering, when something is "stuck in one’s craw" it manifests as an uncomfortable pressure building inside you…much like it does inside Poopypants after “Chili Night in Canada”).
I’m not going to debate the identity of which athlete (not on skates), playing for a Canadian team, should be considered the country’s best player, in the absence of Halladay & Bosh. At best, it would be a specious argument; at worst, I’ll end up in a psych ward because I finally decided to throw feces at the insane co-worker who continues to insist that Rafer Alston could have saved the Raps, if we’d only “given him a chance”.
Yeah, OK.
What I will address is the pathetic, defeated attitude expressed by so many Blue Jays fans at the (entirely expected) departure of Halladay and the unbridled panic that sets in amongst Raptors fans at the mere hint of Bosh leaving (which is, obviously, also, a somewhat predictable transaction).
I'm not suggesting the exits of Halladay & Bosh won't be huge losses to their teams. However, some people seem to think that the loss of Halladay and the imminent/inevitable departure of Bosh makes the city of Toronto akin to a Jessica Simpson movie crossed with a dark & stormy Canadian night…that is, talentless & star-free.
Chris Bosh & Roy Halladay are/were the most popular and most visible faces on their respective teams. Most talented? Maybe. Ultimately, that determination will be made over time, based on the entire careers of CB4 & the Doctor, and the career successes of their Toronto teammates.
Were/are they integral parts of their teams? Sure.
Does their departure signal the irretrievable downfall of their teams, going into the next (couple of) season(s)? Hell, no. No, no, no. In fact, I couldn't scream “NO” any louder right now if I were being told I was being forced to attend a Nickelback concert!
Perhaps, if the teams were both on the precipice of something fantastic, with all the other necessary winning pieces in place, then the absence of Bosh and Halladay would be the ruination of the team(s)...but neither team is in that place!
And people seem to forget that both basketball and baseball are TEAM sports.
In basketball, it is conceivable for a marquee, franchise player to carry a middling team beyond the mediocrity with which they're surrounded. Bosh has shown that he can be that player (case in point, the 2005-2006 season...March of '06, Bosh got injured, the Raps went 1-10 in subsequent games without him). But the team is not currently winning (last season 33-49, so far this season 13-17)...sure, Bosh is their best player, one of the best in the league, but the team, as a whole, needs a LOT of work. Losing him certainly won't *help* the team, but that alone doesn't guarantee the Raptors' downfall.
In baseball, one ace player does not a playoff team make. A pitcher usually works every 5 games. A team plays 162 games per season. A really good pitcher can generally be counted on to get 20 wins in a season (FYI, in 2003, Halladay's best season, in terms of his W-L record, and the year he won his first Cy Young award, he went 22-7 with a 3.25 ERA). Assuming your ace brings in 20 wins, that still leaves 142 games with which to contend. I'm no mathematician, but, that seems like a lot of games.
Let me put it this way: If you have a car with a brand new shiny transmission, but the car also has flat tires, no oil and a body infested with rust, you're not going to get too far, no matter how impressive your tranny (yes, "impressive tranny" could be used as a euphemism).
To summarize: Toronto fans, relax. Our teams have waaaay bigger issues than losing their superstars. Like the Jays' new fetus of a GM. And the fact that Marco Bellinelli gleefully admits that if he weren't playing basketball, he'd be working in fashion.
Anyway...a quick farewell to Mr. Halladay. As he displayed for his entire tenure in Toronto, both on-field & off, Roy Halladay left Toronto the epitome of class...as evidenced by the full-page ad he took out in the Toronto Sun...
Thanks for everything, Doc. You will be missed.
The other day, ESPN’s Bill Simmons
(aka “The Sports Guy”) revealed the contents of an email he had received from a Toronto sports fan, "expressing..dismay that (A) Roy Halladay was traded, and (B) Chris Bosh is a mortal lock to be playing somewhere else next season. By August…Canada's best non-hockey player would be either Hedo Turkoglu or Aaron Hill.”Thanks, Sports Guy!
This gives me the opportunity to address something that’s been sticking in my craw for months. (In case you’re wondering, when something is "stuck in one’s craw" it manifests as an uncomfortable pressure building inside you…much like it does inside Poopypants after “Chili Night in Canada”).
I’m not going to debate the identity of which athlete (not on skates), playing for a Canadian team, should be considered the country’s best player, in the absence of Halladay & Bosh. At best, it would be a specious argument; at worst, I’ll end up in a psych ward because I finally decided to throw feces at the insane co-worker who continues to insist that Rafer Alston could have saved the Raps, if we’d only “given him a chance”.
Yeah, OK.
What I will address is the pathetic, defeated attitude expressed by so many Blue Jays fans at the (entirely expected) departure of Halladay and the unbridled panic that sets in amongst Raptors fans at the mere hint of Bosh leaving (which is, obviously, also, a somewhat predictable transaction).
I'm not suggesting the exits of Halladay & Bosh won't be huge losses to their teams. However, some people seem to think that the loss of Halladay and the imminent/inevitable departure of Bosh makes the city of Toronto akin to a Jessica Simpson movie crossed with a dark & stormy Canadian night…that is, talentless & star-free.
Chris Bosh & Roy Halladay are/were the most popular and most visible faces on their respective teams. Most talented? Maybe. Ultimately, that determination will be made over time, based on the entire careers of CB4 & the Doctor, and the career successes of their Toronto teammates.
Were/are they integral parts of their teams? Sure.
Does their departure signal the irretrievable downfall of their teams, going into the next (couple of) season(s)? Hell, no. No, no, no. In fact, I couldn't scream “NO” any louder right now if I were being told I was being forced to attend a Nickelback concert!
Perhaps, if the teams were both on the precipice of something fantastic, with all the other necessary winning pieces in place, then the absence of Bosh and Halladay would be the ruination of the team(s)...but neither team is in that place!
And people seem to forget that both basketball and baseball are TEAM sports.
In basketball, it is conceivable for a marquee, franchise player to carry a middling team beyond the mediocrity with which they're surrounded. Bosh has shown that he can be that player (case in point, the 2005-2006 season...March of '06, Bosh got injured, the Raps went 1-10 in subsequent games without him). But the team is not currently winning (last season 33-49, so far this season 13-17)...sure, Bosh is their best player, one of the best in the league, but the team, as a whole, needs a LOT of work. Losing him certainly won't *help* the team, but that alone doesn't guarantee the Raptors' downfall.
In baseball, one ace player does not a playoff team make. A pitcher usually works every 5 games. A team plays 162 games per season. A really good pitcher can generally be counted on to get 20 wins in a season (FYI, in 2003, Halladay's best season, in terms of his W-L record, and the year he won his first Cy Young award, he went 22-7 with a 3.25 ERA). Assuming your ace brings in 20 wins, that still leaves 142 games with which to contend. I'm no mathematician, but, that seems like a lot of games.
Let me put it this way: If you have a car with a brand new shiny transmission, but the car also has flat tires, no oil and a body infested with rust, you're not going to get too far, no matter how impressive your tranny (yes, "impressive tranny" could be used as a euphemism).
To summarize: Toronto fans, relax. Our teams have waaaay bigger issues than losing their superstars. Like the Jays' new fetus of a GM. And the fact that Marco Bellinelli gleefully admits that if he weren't playing basketball, he'd be working in fashion.
Anyway...a quick farewell to Mr. Halladay. As he displayed for his entire tenure in Toronto, both on-field & off, Roy Halladay left Toronto the epitome of class...as evidenced by the full-page ad he took out in the Toronto Sun...
Thanks for everything, Doc. You will be missed.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Everybody Loves Christmas, Except Jesus
Driving to work this week, we passed a church with one of those signs outside the front of the building, whose letters can be added/rearranged/changed. Often you'll see bible quotes, psalms, ads for noon-time organ recitals etc.
The message on this church's sign read:
This message confused me, to say the least.
What could Jesus possibly have against Christmas? Who doesn't love birthdays?!
Unless the holiday to which they actually meant to refer was Easter and not Christmas...cuz that would make sense...I could see why Jesus wouldn't love Easter, what with the betrayal, the being nailed to the cross & the dying and whatnot.
It took me a while, but then I realized that what they probably meant to say was "EVERYBODY LOVES CHRISTMAS ACCEPT JESUS".
Ah! The light dawns!
-----------------
Post Script
Driving by the same church this morning, I took a peek to see if they had corrected the sign. Sure enough, it had been updated.
Corrected? Not so much.
Today, the sign reads:
Thanks for the clarity.
I had been affording them the benefit of the doubt, in that they simply might have used the wrong word. Now, I truly don't know what to think.
Can't wait to see how this message evolves over the rest of the week...
The message on this church's sign read:
This message confused me, to say the least.
What could Jesus possibly have against Christmas? Who doesn't love birthdays?!
Unless the holiday to which they actually meant to refer was Easter and not Christmas...cuz that would make sense...I could see why Jesus wouldn't love Easter, what with the betrayal, the being nailed to the cross & the dying and whatnot.
It took me a while, but then I realized that what they probably meant to say was "EVERYBODY LOVES CHRISTMAS ACCEPT JESUS".
Ah! The light dawns!
-----------------
Post Script
Driving by the same church this morning, I took a peek to see if they had corrected the sign. Sure enough, it had been updated.
Corrected? Not so much.
Today, the sign reads:
Thanks for the clarity.
I had been affording them the benefit of the doubt, in that they simply might have used the wrong word. Now, I truly don't know what to think.
Can't wait to see how this message evolves over the rest of the week...
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