To whoever is reading this and thinking "Yeah, we've known that for years" in response to the title of this piece: Shut yer pie-hole, smartass!
Anyway, I need to confess my newest affliction: Ridiculously odiferous feet.
You may think this is funny, but it's NOT! My feet REEK! The odour being produced doesn't seem humanly possible!
I'm extremely concerned. I don't know if this is a legitimate medical problem. If I go to the doctor complaining of uber-stinky feet, will he laugh? Will he be able to assist me? Will I be shunned and ostracized, even moreso than usual?
It's truly embarrassing. It's also becoming a painful & dangerous distraction. You know there's trouble when the stench eminating from beneath your desk from YOUR OWN FEET is causing headaches, nausea and spontaneous ADD.
I don't know what to do...I guess, if we look at the "cup half full (of stink)" version of this, I actually now have a useful weapon at my disposal, should I need one (assuming, of course, I can unsheath said weapon--i.e. remove my shoes--swiftly in case of emergency)....
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2 comments:
Step 1: examine choice of footwear; are they of natural materials?
Step 2: recall time and date of last shower; was it in the last month?
Step 3: have you steered clear of stinky cheese?
Step 4: If you answered YES to all of the above go see your doc.
1. Your feet stink because you haven't seen me in a really long time. A not so common fact: Bean patties, caesar salad and croutons are a natural cure for stinkers.
2. I'm in bed (thank CHRIST for wireless internet) and have read all of your blogs. Haha, now I'm going to pester Eddie with your coolness.
3. I'm still cute, and really small. Weird.
4. I will never throw out my dogs in coats jammie bottoms.
p.s. I just saw the funniest Mr. Lube commercial.
p.p.s. I'm having technology overload and may throw up.
p.p.p.s. I don't think it has anything to do with technology...I'm sick. Stupid wednesdays.
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