I'm surprised I don't walk through the world with a perpetually nonplussed* expression on my face. The idiocy that pervades our culture perplexes me on a daily basis.

For example, I went in to Timothy's** this morning for a cup of coffee. Feeling somewhat sluggish today, I ordered a large coffee. As I was putting my wallet back into my tote, a gentleman*** behind me ordered a latte.

Gentleman: Gimme a latte.

Coffee Server Dude: What size?

Gentleman: What sizes do you have?

Me (internal monologue): Really? Did you really just ask that question? Do the giant signs proclaiming the various sizes and prices somehow escape you? You're wearing a pretty nice suit, I guess I just assumed you could read.Damn stereotypes. Foolish me.

Are you just too lazy to tilt your head the necessary 30 degrees to read the signs?

How could you not understand the sizes? They're not even pretentious, Starbucks-style names!

Then again, Timothy's size differentiation system is fairly complex:

Small
Medium
Large

Nutty, I know. Hearkens back to a time when super-sizing wasn't part of the vernacular and tall didn't mean small.

Coffee Server Dude (pointing to my cup): Well...that's a large...

Gentleman: Oh! I think I'll have...um....hmmmm...MEDIUM. Yes, medium should do it.

I resisted the urge to follow him around to determine if he was similarly confounded by other things the rest of us take for granted....like traffic signals...or gravity....

Happy freakin' Friday!

-----------------------------------------------------------

*Nonplussed is defined as "utterly perplexed" or "confused". This is a public service announcement for the multitudes who use it as a synonym for "unimpressed". Thank you for your time.

** Timothy's: One of Canada's answers to Starbucks. Though Starbucks is as ubiquitous here as it is in the rest of the world, Timothy's is almost as prevelant. For example, I pass 2 Timothy's on my way from the subway to my office and only 1 Starbucks (FYI, it's 2 blocks from the subway to my office).

***Gentleman = Benefit of the Doubt